


Krycek and Mulder (Deceased) I and II

by thebasement_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-04-15
Updated: 2001-04-15
Packaged: 2018-11-20 12:53:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11335938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebasement_archivist/pseuds/thebasement_archivist
Summary: Mulder dies in the first few paragraphs of the story, then spends some time irritating Krycek.





	Krycek and Mulder (Deceased) I and II

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Basement](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Basement), which moved to the AO3 to ensure the stories are always available and so that authors may have complete control of their own works. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Basement's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thebasement/profile).

 

Krycek and Mulder (Deceased) By Megaera

TITLE Krycek and Mulder (Deceased) (1/1)  
AUTHOR Megaera  
DATE January 1999  
E-MAIL   
FEEDBACK Always welcome  
DISTRIBUTION Any time any place anywhere.   
RATING NC-17  
CONTENT WARNING m/m sex, violence  
CATEGORY M/K UST   
SPOILERS None. In the near future....  
KEYWORDS A ghost story  
SUMMARY Mulder dies in the first few paragraphs of the story, then  
spends some time irritating Krycek.  
DISCLAIMER As always, the characters of Mulder and Krycek belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions, lucky sods!   
COMMENTS For those who remember the sixties British series, Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased), the one we used to miss school to see, on a Friday afternoon..... Don't say sequel. Don't say it. If it comes, it comes, if it doesn't, well have some blueberry pie.

* * *

Krycek and Mulder (Deceased)  
By Megaera  


********

It was a normal sort of evening for Alex Krycek. That is, if any evening can be, for a less than honest former Consortium assassin who was permanently on the run from his enemies. As he walked towards his dingy apartment building, he was anticipating a carton of Chinese food and a baseball game repeated on the t.v. It had been a long time since Alex had felt comfortable around strangers, so live sport wasn't the sort of entertainment he preferred. At least not the batting kind. He wouldn't call his state of mind at the moment depressed. He had lived a lonely existence for so long that he was accustomed to it by now. If he was very lucky and very safe, he would risk the occasional night of sex with a stranger. It gave his body release, but seldom gave him any sense of fulfilment. Not tonight though. The word was that there was a shake up coming, and certain parties may not live to see the weekend out. Krycek nourished the secret hope that a certain cigarette smoker might fall prey to the assassins he knew would be on the move.

Well, no-one ever said life was easy!

He was extra alert then, when finding his way back to his apartment. And he was satisfied to note that certain markers he had left on the outside of his apartment door were undisturbed. Nothing obvious, a hair stuck across the join of door and frame, and the piece of paper stuck in the crack of the door, next to the hinge. A careful rat lived to get even, a fool didn't even get to first base. So he *knew* there could be no-one in the apartment, and he was quite relaxed and cheerful, when he walked in.

"Krycek!" Mulder's soft tones shocked him so much, he dropped the cartons he was balancing on his prosthetic arm, and they slithered with a sad crash, to the floor. Krycek swung round towards the sound, his other hand reaching automatically for his gun. In the semi-darkness, he couldn't see Mulder for a moment, then he made out the agent's outline in a deep armchair near the window. "Leave the light off!" Mulder sounded odd, there was something in his voice that Krycek couldn't identify. Well at least he wasn't beating up the younger man this time. Alex squinted in the dark room, trying to see if Mulder was pointing a gun at him, but it was just too dark, and his eyes weren't quite adjusted to the dim light in here yet. 

It seemed safer to play the surprised, but harmless-at-the-moment, ex-partner. 

He put his gun away into its' holster and sank onto the couch opposite Mulder. He still couldn't make out whether Mulder was holding a gun. He gave a sudden chuckle. Hadn't he played this routine in Mulder's own apartment, not so long ago. And got quite carried away at one point. Well Mulder had looked so tempting, lying there like a pagan sacrifice, as helpless and vulnerable as Krycek had ever seen him.

"You don't look like a Consortium assassin!" Alex said, trying to add a note of humour to his voice. "You know that they're out there on the streets tonight? Settling a few old scores!"

Mulder continued to sit silently for a few minutes, which Alex found a little unnerving. Then he gave a pained little laugh. "Yeah! I kind of figured that!" Alex sensed his scrutiny, though he sat in the darkest corner of the room.

Alex persisted in trying to figure out what was on Mulder's mind. "How did you get in anyway? I thought I had the place sealed, and you certainly didn't come in through the front door! You come for any particular reason, or is this just a social call?"

Another of those disturbing silences. "I don't remember how I got here. But I came to ask you something." Alex quirked an eyebrow at his unwelcome guest. "Did you kill my father, Krycek?"

That again. Would the man never give it a rest? 

"You needn't answer Krycek. I know you did!"

Alex glared at Mulder. "Yeah, I did! The bastard deserved it for all the things he did. And you know it! So go ahead and shoot me now, why don't you? Or get out!"

"I haven't got a gun." Mulder's voice was little more than a whisper. "And nothing's that simple any more, Krycek...."

Alex drew his gun again. "Get out before I use this. I don't want to hurt you...." A sigh was the only response, and Mulder didn't move.

"Why are you still here? You want to fight me? Fuck you Mulder!"

"Krycek." Mulder sounded oddly resigned. "Don't you ever listen? It's got more complicated tonight. I walked into my apartment and found three assassins lying in wait..."

"You're looking for a place to hide? And you come to me? Mulder, you must be crazy!" 

"Krycek. Remember how I once swore never to rest until I brought my father's killer to justice! Well I guess I'm never going to do that now.... So you'll have to live with it for the rest of your life!"

"What?" Alex was confused by Mulder's abrupt change in subject. 

"I'm not crazy Alex, I'm dead! And it looks like you're stuck with me!"

"Like hell!" Alex snarled. "I'm putting an end to this charade right now!" He rose to his feet, and moved over to the light switch. Turning towards Mulder, he flicked it on. And for the briefest moment, he was looking at a transparent grey figure that sat in his armchair, watching him resignedly. Then he was alone, in the middle of an empty apartment, staring at an unoccupied void where his former partner had been. With a yell of pure terror, Alex Krycek leapt for the door and fled, slamming it behind him. And for the first time in an eternity, he didn't bother to set his little safeguards.

Behind him, he didn't hear a soft sigh. Well no-one ever said death was easy.....

*******

It was impossible of course. Mulder couldn't be dead. Couldn't be lying somewhere, his body wrecked by a hail of bullets. An odd little shiver ran up Krycek's spine at the thought. Maybe Mulder had been experimenting with holograms or something, and had decided to give him a scare. The trick with the door markers was a good one though. He must have had an accomplice to pull that off. So why did Krycek find himself driving towards Mulder's apartment like a crazy man. And pulling in to the side of the road to watch the ambulance crew loading the shrouded body into a coroner's van. Scully was there, her eyes red with weeping, and a grim faced Skinner was directing his subordinates. A flicker of grey caught the corner of his eye. 

"Told you!" A voice said irritatingly in his ear.

"Shit!" Alex nearly jumped out of his skin. He turned his head to stare into the semi-transparent, grinning face of Fox Mulder. Only Fox Mulder could actually *enjoy* a situation like this. Mulder leaned his elbow on the side of the seat, seemingly able to interact with the world around him a little. He rested his head on it and studied Krycek's face, which was almost as pale as his own. Alex desperately came up with the only question he could think of. "Why aren't you haunting my apartment still?"

Another extremely irritating grin. "Because I'm haunting *you* Krycek. Not very quick, are you!" Anything Alex was about to say was interrupted by a knocking on his car window. Krycek rolled it down and stared into the face of a cop. 

"Can I ask you to move on sir! This is a crime scene." He looked straight at Alex, and didn't even blink, as Mulder reached over, and waved an investigative hand in front of the cop's face. Alex blanched even further. "Are you all right sir?" The cop enquired. Alex tried to keep his face straight as Mulder poked his hand into the cop's shoulder and it passed straight through. 

"Fascinating!" He said in his best Spock voice. "It seems to depend on whether I want it to be solid or not. My hand doesn't go through the seat like that!"

"Yes officer. I'll move on now." Alex hastily drove off, and found a quiet spot in an alley. He turned off the ignition, and turned to look at his unwelcome guest. "He didn't see you!" 

"I'd guess you're the only one who can Krycek. Now isn't this an interesting situation!" 

With a yell of mingled anger and stress, Alex lunged at him, his one fist swinging out to connect with Mulder's jaw. And it passed straight through the ghost at his side, and impacted with the metal strut along the edge of the car window. 

Alex howled in pain, and protectively clutched his hand to his chest. 

"Having a good day Krycek? Mine was worse. Still, we've got all the time in the world to discuss it, so I think I'll be kind, and give you some time to cool off. See 'ya later." With that, the ghost faded into nothing.

Alex leaned his head against the steering wheel, and closed his eyes. Some part of him felt oddly desolate. 

******

Alex Krycek drove round for most of the night, then finally decided to do what he should have done days ago, when he first heard about the Consortium hit squad. He would do a quick run to his apartment, collect his stuff, then head for the hills. Or in his case, a motel somewhere. With his luck at the moment, Norman Bates would run the place.

He pulled up in the alley next to his apartment block, then hurriedly dashed up the fire escape. He didn't want to be in this damned town any longer than necessary, and maybe if he put some distance between him and Mulder's.... corpse...., his little problem would go away. The alternative was to check himself into a quiet little sanatorium somewhere, and explain to a sympathetic doctor how his dead ex-partner was following him around, because the stress of his job as an assassin.

He reached into his pocket for the key to his apartment, and extended it towards the lock. He remembered that he hadn't set any safeguards, but it was too late to worry about that now. And for once, his mind wasn't focused entirely on survival.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you!" Mulder's voice sounded softly next to his ear. Damn him! Why did he have to keep doing that! Alex Krycek's nerves were rapidly becoming shredded. He turned to snarl a reply at the annoying phantom, and heard a clatter and a muffled curse from inside the door. 

"Shut up, you idiot!" A man hissed to his unseen companion. "I tell you, that was his car that went past! He'll be here soon!" Alex Krycek cast a frightened look at Mulder, who shrugged.

"They weren't as careless earlier!" He leaned forward, and his head and shoulders passed through the door. "Looks like the same three that got me. You'd be better off, if you ran off and hid, like always." He sounded bitter.

"Fuck you!" Alex mouthed the curse silently, then knocked at the door and flung himself to one side, as a hail of bullets sounded, blasting splintered holes in the door.. It crashed open and an assassin emerged, gun ready. Alex shot him in the head, then flung himself through the opening, his body low down and close to the floor. He was quite economical with his bullets, he moved so fast that he only needed one shot to finish each of the other men.

Mulder looked impressed, despite himself. "You just crazy, or you feeling suicidal tonight?" he muttered.

"I thought you were the one keen on justice," Krycek retorted. He flung some stuff into a bag, then headed towards his car. "You coming, or you want to stay here and kick their ghostly asses?" A flicker of surprise crossed Mulder's face, then he shrugged and followed.

*******

Alex Krycek drove through the night, and ended up in the proverbial roach central. His companion was silent, and as the sun came up, he gradually seemed to fade into the brightening air, and eventually disappeared. Alex Krycek found himself breathing a sigh of relief. A Mulder he couldn't beat up on, with his wiseass remarks and weird sense of humour, was definitely way down on his list as a choice of companion.

He was so tired that he had absolutely no trouble getting to sleep. And woke up ten hours later, clear headed and with the memory of the oddest dream. Alright, so Mulder was dead. He felt a momentary sadness. But why had his mind conjured up Mulder's ghost. Surely he didn't care that much? He felt a lot better after he had showered and shaved, and had a big breakfast. Then he moved on, heading towards the address of a contact from his Consortium days, about fifteen miles away, who owed him a favour, and would tell him how the power struggle had played out.

It was just growing dark when he arrived. Keeping his gun ready, he entered the building through a window, and snuck into the kitchen behind his ex-lover and former friend, Danny. He pointed his gun at the young man's head. "Danny! How's life treating you?" The smaller man turned, startled, and winced when he saw the gun Krycek held to his head.

"Alex! I heard you were still alive. A lot of people were expecting you to go out in the first round!"

"Yeah well, you know what they say about rats. They get to survive when a ship sinks!"

"I've missed you Alex! No one was ever as good as you." The young man slid his arms round Krycek, feeling the stiffness of his muscles. "Relax Alex. There's no-one here but us. How about it, for old time's sake?" His fingers slipped under Alex's shirt, feeling the firm muscles of his waist. Alex was tempted so much. Danny had always been enthusiastic and athletic in bed. And Alex felt so empty. He leaned forward and wrapped his one arm around Danny's body, pulling him close, and kissed him. He buried his face in the dark hair, wishing desperately for a moment of peace in the storm.

Danny was more than enthusiastic. After all, compared to some of the men he had tried to please for the Consortium, Alex was a veritable banquet. Alex could understand that. Before he had lost his arm, his services had been in demand for the same cause. Thankfully, one armed men found that there wasn't a great demand for their bodies as high class bait, the only plus his injury had brought. Alex closed his eyes and sighed as Danny slithered down his body, ending up on his knees. There was no love in it, of course, but Danny, like him, understood the system of favours. Please Alex, and gain advantage when he moved up in the world.

Danny pulled down Krycek's zipper, and pulled out his already engorged cock. Well, it *had* been a long time. He busily applied his mouth to the swollen head of his prize, licking the pre-ejaculate enthusiastically. Alex groaned in pleasure. Then Danny deep throated him, the mouth that had brought countless targets an expert dose of pleasure, before they found out how stupid they had been when the photographs landed on their desks. And tonight the young man was all his. He couldn't deny the thrilling sense of power the sex brought, but that too was one of Danny's special illusions.

He began to thrust urgently into the luscious mouth, and as he did so, his partner squeezed down on him, wringing a gasp from his mouth as his eyes flew open. And he saw Mulder there, his own eyes wide with disbelief, as the ghost watched him have sex. If a ghost could have blushed, Mulder would be crimson with embarrassment. In fact, Mulder looked like a frightened virgin who had just discovered that the big bad wolf didn't just want to eat her. A background in Russia occasionally threw thoughts like that into his head. Mulder's eyes locked with his, then Alex was coming explosively, his fingers wound in Danny's hair, as the younger man brought him to merciful release.

After that he and Danny went into the bedroom, and began to tug each others clothes off. Idly, Alex wondered if Mulder would follow them and watch. Maybe he would learn something else new that night. That thought brought a shiver of uncertainty to him, it was somehow so tempting, yet contemptible too. Then his lover pulled him down, and distracted him from those disturbing thoughts. And because Alex had been alone for so long, the desire that welled up inside him could not be denied. For just a few hours, he would have this.

*******

Hours later, Alex lay in Danny's bed, the younger man sleeping next to him quietly, Alex's one arm wrapped round his waist. Once, during the night, as he had buried himself deep within his lover's body, Alex had seen a flickering grey shape in the doorway. Alex found himself feeling oddly guilty. Sure, the sex with Danny had been good. He made sure that the younger man enjoyed himself, when Alex fucked him. Which probably set him apart from most of the man's other partners. Not that it was anything but a means of gratification for him. But he just *knew* Mulder would have a sarcastic comment ready.....

He did, and he made an appearance when Alex slipped to the bathroom in the early morning.

"I've got to admit, I never knew that about you, Krycek!" What Alex heard in Mulder's voice was more puzzlement, rather than anything else. "That you got your kicks out of using someone like that! No wonder you fitted in so well with the Consortium." For the first time since he had been shot, Mulder looked perturbed. "I thought you were better than that...."

"Shut the fuck up, you damned voyeur. You didn't have to watch us, you could have faded out, or whatever you do to go away. Or maybe you just wanted to get a little entertainment watching me?" 

Mulder glared at him, anger making his eyes shine. 

"What you choose to do for cheap sex is your own business, Krycek, but I don't exactly have a choice here. I *have* to stay near you. I've tried to go away, but I can't! I just wondered if you had to pay him afterwards, that's all!"

"Shut up!" Alex flushed red in fury. 

Mulder gave a cold smile. "Make me!"

"Alex?" Danny walked into the bathroom, naked and blinking the sleep out of his eyes. "Who're you talking to?"

Alex shook his head. "No-one!" Danny stared at him, evidently wondering whether he had lost his mind. Not uncommon in his profession. The two of them got ready in silence, Danny obviously picking up on the older man's moodiness. Danny made a few phone calls after breakfast, and came back grinning. Evidently there was good news on the way. Mulder just sat watching Alex unnervingly, all the time he was eating, occasionally making some barbed comment that Alex did his best to ignore.

******

//Damn Alex Krycek! When had his feelings towards the man ever been so confused? Alex had stunned him last night, when he had started to kiss the young man. Alex, gay? And what he had done with the all too willing Danny after that! Mulder had watched his share of porn films over the years, but he had never considered taking part in *that* particular form of recreational sex. It had been quite an education in many ways. Stunning, in fact, maybe because it had been Alex Krycek that was doing it.

But what had bothered him more than anything else had been the barely disguised boredom and contempt on the younger man's face when Alex wasn't looking at him. The sort of look a whore reserves for his/her clients. Mulder had felt disgust for Danny. Couldn't Alex see what he was? Or did Alex know, and just use Danny anyway?//

******

"The Boss won out, Alex. He wants to see us both as soon as possible. He has promotion in mind for one of us, I think." Alex saw Mulder rise to his feet, a look of sudden interest on his face. Of course, he would want to know all the things that were kept secret by the men who had arranged his death. But something in the way Danny said that last part made him feel a slight unease. If his boss had arranged for Alex to be targeted, then he now knew exactly where to find him, thanks to Danny. He turned to the younger man.

"I'm sorry. I have to go now. I don't feel safe here We can meet up later!" He turned to leave, and saw Mulder's face suddenly light up in warning. Instinct took over, and he flung himself to one side, so the iron only crashed into his good shoulder, not his head. Danny had chosen who he would be loyal to, and his bosses future plans didn't include one Alex Krycek.. Through the white hot agony that told him he had broken something, Alex moved, using his left leg in a classic martial arts kick to Danny's stomach. A follow up caught the smaller man under the chin, and crushed the cartilage of his throat. Then he stared at his lover's body, and for a moment Mulder saw a sense of desolation reflected in the green eyes. 

"Why do they all die?" Alex whispered.

******

//Mulder had seen the younger Consortium man suddenly pick up a weighty iron and swing it at Krycek's head, and his F.B.I. instincts had taken over. His attempt to warn Krycek had only been partially successful, but it was enough to save Krycek's thrice damned life. And as the rat bastard had staggered towards his car, and Mulder felt the inevitable pull that always drew him after Alex, he wondered at his own motives. Why had he saved Krycek, when he felt such hatred for him sometimes? Twice now! Because he was a fool, of course.//

******

Somehow Alex made it out to the car, through the waves of blackness, and found his way back to the motel. Struggling with his prosthetic arm to pull off his shirt took about fifteen minutes of pure agony. He stared dully at the purple contusion marking his skin. He guessed that his collar or shoulder bones were broken. Dizzy with pain, he fumbled some Tylenol into his mouth and lay on the bed. As he drifted into a pain filled sleep, Mulder's face seemed to swim before his eyes. Strangely, he looked concerned. But when had Mulder ever treated him with anything but contempt?

"You're dead. Go away!" he mumbled. 

"And you're in trouble Alex."

"Yeah. Tell me something I don't know," Alex whispered. "God, I feel so dizzy....." His voice trailed away as sleep claimed the exhausted Krycek. Mulder stared in consternation at the white faced young man. Slowly, he reached out and trailed his fingers over Krycek's hair, tousled and messed up by the fight. To his surprise, it stirred faintly under his hand, as if a breeze was ruffling it. 

So he could affect the physical world, if he wanted to enough!

He froze, reconsidering what had just gone through his mind. Why did he want, so much, to touch Alex? It was probably just that he was suffering from a lack of human contact. Wasn't it?

//Yeah, sure. What else could it be?//

******

Mulder looked at the younger man's face, even now, shadowed with pain. In his sleep Krycek was curiously vulnerable, he looked innocent and insecure. The big, bad Consortium assassin moaned restlessly, and a shiver ran through him. 

He looked so pathetically wretched and lost, in fact.

"Alex, you idiot!" Krycek didn't hear the note of anxiety and regret in Mulder's words. "Don't worry Krycek. I'll watch your back. I don't have much else to do at the moment."

******

End of Krycek and Mulder (Deceased) - (1/1)

\--   
megaera

 

* * *

 

Ghost of a Chance  
by Megaera  
DATE: September 2000  
RATING: NC-17 Mulder is dead, but that doesn't stop him...  
CATEGORY: M/K UST  
COMMENTS: Sequel to Krycek and Mulder Deceased, but can be read alone. A short story for Kschmo7177 who never stopped asking...  


* * *

Ghost of a Chance  
by Megaera

Fox Mulder is dead.

Not a problem, you might think. He was always such an irritating presence in my life. Turning up in the oddest places, and always managing to upset my plans. I should be glad that he was gunned down in his apartment one night. Surely he could see that all of his interference was dangerous, that he was upsetting the wrong men..... I guess not. In a few brief moments, all of that potential, all of that brilliance was gone forever.

Well, not exactly.......

It turns out that the laws of the universe have a few odd little quirks. If you kill a guy's father and he holds a grudge like no other ever did...... Then he comes back as a ghost!

Yeah. Mulder's ghost haunts me. During the hours of darkness, he makes his appearance and follows me about my business, making the occasional sarcastic remark, and trying to act like the moral guardian of the whole world. How many professional assassins could put up with the things I have to bear? Not many. Of course, no-one else but me can see him, which makes for some interesting times in my life. My professional colleagues have begun to tread carefully around me, even more paranoid than they used to be, because they think I'm going insane.

Insanity is, of course, relative. Killing is a profession well accustomed to madmen. It may even help. Look how many certifiable nuts get elected to public office around the world.

I could never be sure I was alone, and when my personal phantom did make an appearance, it was all I could do to keep my mouth shut, even in public. I didn't particularly want a room in a mental hospital. The one thing that continued to perplex me was that Mulder, my avowed enemy, had twice saved my life.

Why did I have to get the world's most irritating and provoking F.B.I. agent as my own, personal ghost?

Tonight was fairly typical. The first sign that he was there was the bright pinpoints of his eyes, showing up against the pale coverlet of my bed in the latest of my anonymous, hotel rooms. Slowly, the rest of him materialised, and I saw that he was lying back, relaxed, hands behind his head. He grinned disconcertingly.

"Busy tonight?" he asked curiously.

As if he didn't know I had a job to do tonight. That was the thing with Mulder He loved making me feel uncomfortable. He knew I got nervous before a hit, and anything he could do to make things worse....., you guessed it...., he did.

Like his latest trick of appearing suddenly right up close to me at unexpected moments. The first time he had tried it, I had leapt feet into the air, and he had chuckled appreciatively. The fact that I had been in a somewhat delicate situation at the time delighted him. My hand had been wrapped around my cock and I had been enthusiastically jerking off, then a maliciously grinning face had appeared inches above my face

"Boo!" it said.

I had been so unnerved, I swear I levitated off the bed, and my cock had gone completely limp with shock. I cursed him loudly in three languages. None of which bothered him at all. He had made me react twice more since then, once when I was almost asleep, and once, humiliatingly, when I was using the john.

"Just so you don't get too relaxed, Krycek!" he had quipped, ignoring my curses.

I hate him.

But tonight, paradoxically, I was glad he was there. That's the thing about working alone so much. No one can be trusted, not if you want to stay alive. At least Mulder could be trusted to keep my secrets to himself. And he seemed to care what happened to me. Sometimes. Maybe he had figured out that if I died, I was going to catch up with him and beat the hell out of him!

I moved through the crowd like the predator I was. None of the delegates at the security conference knew what I was, so it was easy to blend in with the crowd. I wore my geek clothes, and I looked like one of the many hackers who were in attendance, whose sole purpose in life was to check out the latest in computer security, probably in order to circumvent it. The scent of paranoia was in the air. Justifiably, since I was here to kill one of them.

My employers had been annoyed to find that their computer system had been broken into, and some sensitive information had been downloaded. But the hacker had been careless in covering his tracks, and he had been traced. The man named James P. Boyd was about to die!

I watched my target, as he headed for the men's room. The stupid Mr. Boyd, spotty nerd, was easy to locate. His computer, which I destroyed an hour ago when I burned his house down this afternoon, had contained a lot of material on government conspiracy theories and it was easy to predict which conferences he would attend. Easy to spot. Even easier to kill. I followed him into the men's room. Silently I closed the door behind me and pulled my knife out. The nerd didn't even notice me behind him. I hefted my knife and moved towards him.

Something large and metallic crashed unexpectedly into my shin, tripping me and I fell onto my ass on the tiled floor. The nerd swung round, caught sight of the knife on the floor next to me and fled. Shit! I think I'd twisted my ankle. Time to get out of there before the little creep called the cavalry in....

"Oops! Sorry... I seem to have knocked the trash over!" Mulder materialised, grinning wickedly.

"You.... you.....!" Words failed me. I finally muttered something filthy to him in Russian. I headed for the exit, only to see the nerd pointing me out to a couple of cops outside. Thinking fast, I jammed the door shut using the upended trash can and made a hasty escape through the back window. Damn Mulder! He'd ruined my hit! Then I paused and thought about it again. How exactly had he done that?

The desire for a hot shower to ease the ache in my leg soon drove it out of my mind. And later, a few vodkas, for medicinal purposes.....

Mulder studied the sleeping Alex. He didn't know why he liked being near Alex. They had always been enemies, and their views of the world were poles apart. But Alex was so full of life. He burned with it, a firebrand of energy, so that being close to him was almost like being alive again.

Maybe that's why he had taken so much trouble to annoy Alex. When those green eyes blazed with fury, Mulder could feel a part of himself answering, an echo of life that sent a flood of strength through him. In fact, he thought he was strong enough now to interact with the world around him. At least, during the night. During the day, he seemed to float in a disembodied limbo, only occasionally aware of his surroundings, and certainly not able to control his movements.

Hesitantly, he reached out a hand towards the coffee cup Alex had abandoned on the nearby table and exerted all of his willpower. It was rather an anticlimax. The cup lifted easily in his hand, and he felt the cool ceramic surface beneath his finger.

Incredible!

How could he have forgotten the pleasure of tactile sensation so soon. As ghost, he had felt little for months, bare fragments of what he remembered from life. And now, to have touch back again.....

Adventurously, he prodded the table, and found that he could control the solidity of his hand. Then he grinned in exhilaration. This was more like it! If he could interact with the world, he could do so much more. It was only limited by proximity to Alex.

Curious now, he hesitantly reached his hand out to his sleeping "partner." Alex felt solid and warm, and Mulder watched as his hand slowly rose and fell with the movement of Alex's chest beneath it. The nearer he got to Alex, the stronger he was

Mulder felt alive.

Slowly he traced his finger along the smooth flesh, feeling the tiny changes in texture beneath it, as he stroked Alex. His finger approached the darker rosy nipple, and he found himself lost in wonder as he felt it rise and come alive under his touch, filling with blood and hardening to prominence. Alex heaved a small breathy sigh in his sleep. Again experimentally, Mulder leaned over and lowered his tongue to the small mound, tasting it and running his tongue across it, sucking it gently. Mulder tasted the slight salt tang of Alex's skin, again an incredible sensation. He felt as though he were just discovering the world again after a period of sensory deprivation. The small nipple hardened further under his tongue.

Eager for more, Mulder traced his fingers further down Alex's body, until he reached the sheet which lay across Alex's stomach, covering his lower boy. Again, it was easy to tug it lower. Mulder felt stronger than he had ever felt before, and didn't hesitate. The sheet glided down across Alex's hips and exposed his quiescent cock and firm thighs. Mulder leaned closer and found that he could even smell the faint musky scent of Alex's body.

It was dangerously addictive, this reminder of life.

Mulder continued his light caressing of Alex's body, enjoying the pure pleasure of it. The way tiny goose-bumps rose across Alex's skin as his cool hand passed over it. Too tempting. Then with an impulse he couldn't have named, Mulder touched Alex's cock and watching the slow reddening as blood began to flow into it as his hand skimmed lightly over its surface. Alex muttered something incoherent, and moaned softly, his hips turning slightly as he leaned into the caress. Mulder froze. What the hell was he doing?

He was almost making love to Krycek! Just for a moment, he had been on the verge of leaning over and seeing whether the sense of taste he was rediscovering extended to.....

The ratbastard who had killed his father!

He jerked his hand away as if he had been burned. What the hell was he thinking? Alex made him feel alive, sure, but he was treating the younger man more like a lover.... This was madness! He backed away, even now feeling a strange reluctance. This was too good, this newly awakened awareness of life.

Mulder moved further away from Alex. He needed time to think. And as the first rays of the dawn entered the room, he disappeared into the limbo of daytime.

Where the hell had that come from? I had been having the strangest dream. The touch of a lover was something I had little recent experience of. Life was too dangerous. My last sexual partner betrayed me, and besides which, I could just imagine Mulder's reaction.

I wouldn't be able to keep my mind on the proceedings with Mulder popping up from nowhere to interrupt me. As he certainly would. Those brown eyes would gleam wickedly, and he would probably begin a loud and very distracting commentary on my performance. Mulder loved annoying me. Unless I found someone who I could fuck in daylight. Though they tended to notice my arm more readily and it was harder to find a more attractive man of the type I preferred. Tall, beautiful and willing to let me take the lead.....

So why had I started to dream about Fox Mulder? Too long without sex, probably. And what a dream! Mulder making love to me, almost tenderly.

When had I ever wanted Mulder? When had Mulder ever been interested in me? Crazy!

My boss wasn't pleased. In fact he was furious. Apparently it had taken three operatives a couple of days to pick up Mr. Nerd's trail after my failure. Time enough for him to confide in one or two other sad bastards who also had to be... sterilised. My boss the Englishman raged at me, using some favoured Anglo Saxon expressions, one or two of which were new even to me. I filed them away to use on Mulder later.

"Alex, you fucked up!" he snarled. I tried to look contrite. I could hardly say that it wasn't me, it was Mulder... "I'm giving you another chance though! Don't foul this up! I'll have a prisoner I want you to take to our Pennsylvanian facility. Be at this address tomorrow to do a pick up." He pushed a piece of paper across his desk towards me. "Now get out!"

Accompanied by the smirks of his two bodyguards, I fled.

Relatively painless, I suppose. I had expected a lot worse from the Englishman. I wondered where the catch was. But I didn't have a lot of choices; he was one of the few employers who still used my services. If I fucked *this* up, then I would probably have to go solo. If I survived.

For once, the limbo that surrounded him was no shield against the turmoil of his own mind. He alternately raged at Alex and his own stupidity. But in the end, it all came down to something he was afraid to admit even to himself. He wanted Alex. He needed Alex....

He wished he had the power to throw something, or hit something....

He longed for Alex. He wanted to touch him, to hold him..... Now he knew it was possible, he couldn't stop thinking about it. He had lived with the man for months now, and he had seen aspects of the young man's character that he had never dreamed of. Yes he was amoral and murderer, but also desperately lonely, with no one to turn to when life grew dangerous. No wonder it had warped him...

A part of his mind also whispered that he only wanted Alex because there was no one else....

I awaited Mulder's appearance that night with a tension that surprised me. He was getting stronger, and more troublesome, and it had occurred to me that he now had the ability to get me into a lot more trouble, if he wanted to. It seemed he could now interact with the world. The way he had thrown that trash can under my feet suggested he was more than just a spirit now.

I wished he would work with me, instead of against me.

With the coming of dusk, I glanced around, trying to spot him. Nothing. Not even a flicker of a shadow. Mulder was like that. Never predictable. He might not appear for hours, hoping to catch me off guard, damn him. Why did there always have to be conflict between us? He was probably watching me right now, laughing at me...

"Damn you, Mulder!" I growled at the empty room. "At least when you were alive, I could fight back!"

A cloudiness appeared in the corner, which resolved itself within moments into Mulder. He stared at me, for once silent and without making any wisecracks. It was a little unnerving. In fact he did look different somehow, more serious perhaps...

"I couldn't let you kill that man!" he said after the silence had stretched to several uncomfortable minutes. I was on the verge of telling him what I thought of him using a selection of choice expletives, but I hesitated. Finally, I just told him the truth.

"You idiot!" I replied. "I would have made it quick and painless. Because of you, he had time to tell his friends and then they had to die too!"

"Death isn't painless, Alex..."

It was the first time he had ever talked about his situation. I was curious, despite my annoyance.

"What is it like?" I dared to ask. Something seemed to flicker across his face, something sad...

"Lonely..." he whispered.

"Yeah?" I said. "You see me having much fun lately, Mulder? The only company I've had in the last year tried to kill me, in case you didn't notice. The only company apart from you, that is..."

Maybe it was getting to me tonight, the isolation I felt. Or maybe I'd just been alone too long, Something just snapped within me. I grabbed the nearest thing off the table, a bottle of vodka, and I threw it at him as hard as I could. Then I was screaming incoherently at him, throwing everything I could get my hands on.

"I'm sorry!" he said simply.

He watched me in silence, totally unaffected by anything I did. The missiles I threw just went straight through him and hit the walls behind with a series of crashes. Damn him! Damn him for taunting me! Damn him for fucking up my life!

Damn him for dying!

The rage left me as suddenly as it had come and I sank back onto my couch, as the pain welled up inside me. Was that what I'd been trying to hide from myself for so long? Losing him before I'd ever got to.... to...

I think I realised then that I *had* cared about him. That I wanted him still. I couldn't hide it from myself any more. I felt a betraying tear ease its way down my cheek and flushed, trying to turn away so he wouldn't see.

Stupid! And pointless! When had loving Fox Mulder ever been an option for me? And it was impossible now!

Alex was crying! Mulder watched, stunned, as the young man turned his face away and pretended to be staring at something on the other side of the room. But the light caught on something shiny that glittered on his cheek. His image of the cold, heartless assassin was forever shattered now. Alex was as lonely and miserable as he was.

Slowly, he moved forward until he stood before Alex, reached out one finger, and brushed the glittering tear away from Alex's cheek. It hung suspended on his finger for a moment, then he let it roll off his skin onto the floor. He knew now from his experimentation that he could remain semi-solid for quite a while now. Longer still when he was close to Alex.

Alex caught his breath, and stared incredulously at the droplet, before turning his face upwards to meet Mulder's gaze. Hesitantly, Mulder extended his hand, palm outwards to touch Alex. His hand rested gently on Alex's chest, and he noted with a kind of wonder the slight bump of the nipple as it hardened, the warmth he could feel, even through the light cotton t-shirt.

Alex gasped, his green eyes wide. He raised a shaking hand and touched Mulder's fingers hesitantly. His hand met cool solidity.

"Oh!" he whispered wonderingly. For once, he looked more like that green young agent Mulder remembered, and less like an assassin.

Before Mulder could think about it, he leaned forward, tilted Alex's chin upwards and kissed him.

Being close to Alex when he was sleeping had been like being close to a flame. The heat and energy of life had made Mulder feel almost alive himself. But this.... Kissing Alex was like being close to the sun. A white heat that set him on fire. Energy surged through him and he felt as though he could move a mountain or jump a thousand miles into the air. He heard Alex moan into his mouth, felt the young man's fingers clutch at his hair.

Mulder felt a thousand different sensations all at once. The taste of Alex's mouth, soft and sweet with a hint of vodka, the slight roughness of his tongue as it tangled with his own. Warmth that flowed through him, unexpectedly delicious. And the way he moaned softly, his fingers tightening as if he wanted to cling to Mulder for the rest of the night.

Finally, they broke apart, Alex panting heavily, though Mulder found that he wasn't affected by such a human concern as breathing during a kiss

"I need to think about this...." Alex gasped. "Mulder..... " His eyes reflected his confusion.

"Yeah!" Mulder nodded. " I know. Maybe if I leave you alone tonight..."

Oh God, never in my wildest dreams had I ever imagined anything like that! I could touch him! I could feel every caress, and the way his mouth had moulded to mine...

Most incredible of all, was that he had wanted me! Why else would he kiss me? Like that! With a tenderness that made the loneliness disappear for just a short while... Yet strange too. Cooler than human, a strange texture to his skin and hair that wasn't unpleasant, yet wasn't human either.

Whatever he was, whatever he'd become, my body liked it There was an ache between my legs that had told me my cock had woken when he kissed me, and it definitely approved of him. In fact, now I though of it, I was harder and more ready than I had been for a long time. My hand went down to cover the denim covered mound, and I was momentarily tempted to pull it out and frantically jerk off to the memory of hazel eyes and a single, cool-fleshed kiss.

I dragged my hand reluctantly away. No. That wasn't what I wanted at all. I wanted something else. I wanted him, no matter how odd our relationship would be. How unreal this was. Maybe I didn't want reality any more.

"You don't have to leave!" I said loudly to the invisible Mulder. "I.... I want you to stay... I want you...

The first thing that materialised, I swear, was a big Cheshire Cat grin!

End of Ghost of a Chance

  
Archived: April 04, 2001 


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